Obscenities in Pangasinan

Fire breathing BM Ranjit Ramos Shahani

By Mortz C. Ortigoza

 An information guy should maximize his publicity works for his beleaguered boss. He should stop playing around with his sexy staff. Media men are worried that the other paramour, a powerful man, of the lass would discover the illicit relationship. One of the staff in the office has been telling stories of the affairs of the woman with the powerful man and the propaganda man. Her affairs scandalize and offend the staff there. “Kabago-bago lang sa opis, pero feeling niya boss na rin siya,” one of the male staff there told media men on the woman. ***
A political spectator reacted on my last week’s column “Pathetic Manaoag – Kim and Ming”. He told me that after vice mayoral bet Aiza Villacorta died, mayoralty bet Angie Sales, the wife of Mayor Nap Sales, handpicked a new vice mayoralty bet -Lito Arenas – a favored contractor at the Department of Agriculture. “How pathetic was the tandem of Sales, both of the mayoralty and vice mayoralty candidates have no experience in any post in the government.
Look at Ming (Rosario, mayoralty bet) at least he became a town councilor and board member before venturing for the mayoralty,” he quipped. He took a dig too at mayoralty bet Kim Amador (incumbent vice mayor) crowing to the media that he interceded for some projects like an edifice built near the municipal hall, and the two million pesos he chalked up recently from the Department of Budget & Management he told everyone happened because of his diligence. “Don’t believe about that diligence. He could easily get a fund from the DBM because his sister Claire is an undersecretary there. But he must know that he would be offending the district congresswoman by what he is doing. He was preempting the solon for the funds that should be downloaded to her.”
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The past week this Baguio City born columnist has been relishing the book “Senator Cipriano P. Primicias: Vignettes and Anecdotes on His Life and Times “ given to the members of the Sangguniang Panglalawigan (provincial board) by the kin of former Pangasinan Governor Cipriano ”Tito” Primicias, Jr. during the necrological service program at the august chamber in December 10.
Thanks to BM Ranjit Ramos Shahani, former congressman and former vice governor, who grudgingly lent the book to me because I was interrupting his intellectual skirmishes with the local media men Atong Remogat, Vir Maganes, and his immensity Bobot Caracas. “Geez, please stop your conversation and hear what the book said! Don’t you know that the 60 years running political feud between the Marambas and the Primicias (who are relatives) was because of a “Be-e” (woman) in Ms Nieves Benito – who won the Miss Pangasinan plum in the Manila Carnival in 1930 and who jilted Thomas Maramba and married Cipriano Primicias,” I told them as I underscored the paragraphs written by Massachusett Institute Technology alumnus Larry Maramba Henares whose witty and humorous column “Maramba-Primicias Feud” was featured in the book. “The family (Marambas) had a word for Primicias, sagen, meaning a stray dog that has wandered in beefing for food.
You see, he wandered into the family (house) by marrying Nieves Benito… Benito was a very pretty Miss Pangasinan who represented us in Manila Carnival of 1930”. “Oh ito pa! Sabi ni Larry bastos daw ang salita ng Pangasinan. “In Pangalatok, Titi means to fry, guisa; Kiki means to tickle, kiliti; Bayag means tagal, takes too long; and Otot (hahaha), means daga, rat or mouse. Nobody from Pangasinan except me, Eddie Ramos, Bert Romulo and Joe de Venecia speak the dialect. Pangasinan is indeed a dying language” A “pestered” Ranjit, a graduate of Georgetown University in the US and four subjects shy of Bachelor of Laws at University of the Philippines, told me to set aside the book because I was interrupting his intellectual calisthenics with the “who’s who’ of the fourth estate.
Atong emphatically seconded the board member because I was ruining their analysis on my earlier statement that I got a “boner” every time Ranjit talked about international politics (Atong and Ranjit agreed that a boner, a slang, is a misnomer. Ranjit said how can a male organ have a bone when it only hardens through the thickness of skin and the pumping of jets of blood.
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On page 35 of the book there is a photo of former Senator Arturo Tolentino, who looks like actor Jake Cuenca, at 91 years and who was sharp as the manhood of media men Harold Barcelona and Ronel de Vera when interviewed for the book, said with the pattern crop of politicians, I think our politics then was very different. We debated on principles and on ideas that were for the good of the people, and not for personal benefit.
But now, I see most politicians as motivated by the desire for personal benefit. And so, politics then was very different in the sense that when election time comes, we do not choose by money. There was no money politics that time. During our time, we chose candidates by their record and the performance that they have. That is the reason why at this time; I do not want to enter politics anymore. This is not the kind of politics in which I was trained.” Son of a gun, the dig of Turing Tolentino, prolific author of the Philippine Civil Law books, are a comeuppance to Senators Lito Lapid and Bong Revilla and Congressman Manny Pacquiao . ***
On page 34 the irrepressible and rabble rouser former Marcos Minister and former Pangasinan Governor Condrado Estrella (I had a privileged to hear his verbal spectacles years ago in Lingayen) said that Senator Primicias fits well as Majority Floor Leader.
 He studies and is very well prepared during sessions. He is very studious. Before, there were quality bills; now laws passed are more on changing of names of streets or of towns… very shallow.” When asked about “Pork Barrel” during their time, the Minister was quick in telling us that “ it was just a “piker” as compared to what people in position have now.” The former Pangasinan Governor mused that Senator Primicias’ statement which he cannot forget was “I would rather be right than win an election.”
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After speed reading the book on Lakay Cianong Primicias, I felt that somehow I became part of the history of this colorful and heritage-rich humongous province (bigger than the combined provinces of Ilocos Norte, Ilocos, Sur, and La Union where the four are geographically interlinked in Region 1) after I cut my teeth here as pen pusher and marrying the former Mildred Rosario of Brgy.Sapang, Sta. Barbara.
 My wifey is a town mate of Ka Cianong, Thomas Maramba, and my kasimanwa Larry whom the latter I met and has a chance to chat at the birthday of former Speaker Joe de Venecia at the swanky Golden Bay Chinese Restaurant in Pasay City last December 26, 2011 (Gypsy, sana maulit uli ang pag imbita niyo sa akin sa December 26 para maisu-ot ko uli iyong Americana coat ko na pinamana pa ng Lolo ko na lumaban noon sa Katipunan).
(You can read my selected thought-provoking columns athttp://mortzortigoza.blogspot.com. and articles at Pangasinan News Aro. You can send comments too at totomortz@yahoo.com)